Testing: Friday Feelings

Hello friends. Today I come to you with something entirely experimental. Pursuant to last night’s post about putting more of myself out there, I’m going to try and do just that. A blogger and writer I enjoy (Maggie Slater) does a weekly roundup every Friday, and I really like the idea of reviewing my week and talking a bit without needing to have a specific topic in mind (unlike my Thursday posts). So, I’m gonna test it out and see how I feel.

img_9339
tfw you feel like you don’t even deserve to feel imposter syndrome

Yesterday (and today) I got some great news regarding the freelancing opportunity I applied for in February. The pitches I submitted were accepted by the editor and all that’s left to do now is to sign the contracts and start writing. I’ve got some complicated feelings on this (though I’m obviously both excited and nervous), mostly about how… well, how easily this opportunity came to me. It literally appeared in my Twitter feed right when I needed it most, within days of me starting to explore freelance writing. There was no struggle in the trenches, as I have often heard freelancing described. Not even a rejection. It has been a very smooth process thus far, and while I am still in the early stages (I have yet to write anything heartier than a synopsis), it just hasn’t jived with what I expected landing a gig as a freelancer might be like.

Which is a good thing, don’t get me wrong. The anxiety brain always makes things sound worse than they inevitably are. But, to be honest, has given me a modicum of imposter syndrome. Like… do I really deserve to have gotten this far? Then I remember, that I’m barely off the starting line. I’ve made no money, I’ve written no words. So… do I really even deserve to claim imposter syndrome?


I bit the bullet and opened up an Instagram account. That, too, was fraught with second-guessing. I mentioned in my New Year’s Resolutions post in January that I have been thinking about this since last year, but ended up not doing it because the idea of sharing images of my personal space grinds my anxiety button. And that’s still true! The thing about Instagram is that it’s designed to be pretty, and my life aint pretty. I mean that literally. I don’t have these neatly curated writing spaces, or carefully posed props. What I have is a mess. Again, literally. But also figuratively.

But… isn’t that kind of a reason in and of itself to just go for it? For better or for worse, this is the low-income writing life and others living it deserve to see (and show) that it’s not always the ‘gram level ideal.

At least that’s the soapbox I stood on to convince myself to sign up. We’ll see if it bears out.

(eta: if you’re on Insta as well, please add me and validate this choice! I’m @justanotherstrugglingwriter)


snowflake
snowflake

I’m in the very, very early stages of planning a personal project, and the nature of it requires extensive planning. Even more so than I usually like. So, I decided I would take this opportunity to re-examine the Snowflake Method of plotting a novel. I have tried it once or twice in the past, but found it was too rigorous in it’s planning, (which, for me, is weird). However, that high level of forethought might be just what I need for this new project. I look forward to exploring it and sharing with you all how it goes.


I think that’s everything from me. I’ve got to get started on my very first freelance writing project wtaf. It’s still strange to say. Should I tell my family? Or should I wait until the draft it accepted? Or should I wait until I have payment in hand? It’s all new and exciting and also wow I hope I don’t screw this up.

See you all next next week! Until then, may your writing be plenty and your struggles be few.

Kerry Share

Twitter || Instagram || Ko-Fi

One thought on “Testing: Friday Feelings

  1. Pingback: Testing: Monday Motivations – Just Another Struggling Writer

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