Monday Motivations; Eight of Wands

Hello friends and welcome to another wiry week of writing.

If you called on me every Monday to name a theme for my upcoming week, this time it would definitely be trimming the fat.

After what felt like eons with nothing to do, the freelance work has definitely picked up and suddenly I’m awash in assignments. It’s all a little bit daunting if I’m being totally honest. How am I supposed to squeeze in all this extra work around… all the other work. (Also I literally signed up for this; what was I thinking?)

For a good while now, probably the last 12 or 14 months even, I’ve been wanting, yet struggling, to finally let go of, well, time wasting activities. A lot of it is social media. Twitter, Reddit (the AITA page is a particular productivity suck), the usual. I also have the bad habit of coming home and throwing myself on my bed and not moving again until the alarm goes off the next morning.

Which is fine every once in a while. But it’s not really a sustainable way of life for a wannabe working writer.

I know this. I’ve known this, yet kicking the bad habit has been, up to this point, impossible. That’s because when it comes to self motivation, I’m as weak-willed as my 11 year old son in his first year staying home after school standing in front of a stocked pantry with no adults around to tell him to have a cup of applesauce for snack rather than five bags of goldfish and half a gallon of chocolate milk.

But! I am very, very motivated by outside expectations. Give me a deadline and I’ll work breakneck to meet it, even if that means giving up some of my precious doing-absolutely-nothing time.

So, yeah, maybe this influx of work is a little overwhelming. For the moment. But I don’t think it’s outside my capabilities. I just need to trim a little fat in my time budget. And that’s my motivation this week.

Until next time friends.

Kerry Share

Monday Motivations; The Magician

Hello friends and welcome to another wishful week of writing.

I’ll be real honest friends. I was not feeling it this morning. It’s been a discouraging couple of weeks. My freelance endeavors are stalling, my personal writing has been sluggish and uninspired, and I’ve just had a sense of malaise settle over me that has been difficult to shake.

I keep trying to console (and cajole) myself out of this slump but it feels like my self-motivations have increasingly diminishing returns. That culminated this morning in a point blank refusal to accept any platitudes or promises that I’ll eventually crawl out of this slump.

Now, normally a mood like that would call for a mental health / self-care / don’t think at all about writing day, but honestly I think that would just make things worse. I want to be writing and working right now. But I can’t force it to come. Or can I?

I feel like I’m stuck in the middle of a “writers block isn’t real” debate and I don’t know which side is right. Do I allow myself a guilt free moment of respite or do I push through the mental barriers?

And that’s where I’m stuck. There is no motivation this week. Just a lot of conflicting advice.

Until next time my friends.

Kerry Share

Monday Motivations; Queen of Wands

Hello friends and welcome to another woeful week of writing.

As regular readers may have noticed, I’ve been a tad absent of late, and as regular readers might surmise, that absence is due in large part to the first depressive episode since starting my anti-depressant showing it’s ugly face.

I won’t harp on it too long since there is no new ground to tread, but I continue to be so, so grateful to those who have and still stick by me even when I am at my lowest. If that includes you, dear reader, your energy is not missed and is deeply felt and appreciated.

The good news is I’m starting to come around again, and not a moment too soon because after a three month hiatus, I finally have a freelance contract and accompanying manuscript to work on again. Though I still have to fight off all the normal gremlins that come with starting a new project (why are beginnings so haaaard), my mood noticeably improved the other day when I opened my laptop and started a new Scrivener doc. Which is odd because historically writing when I’m depressed doesn’t go very well and tends to bring me down even lower.

And yet despite having an incredibly stressful year in 2021 with difficulties in my day job and as a parent, I still managed to turn in six novellas last year. Wilder still is that every single one of them was on time. While I can easily say I was depressed the majority of the year, I still got my work done.

It makes me wonder sometimes if my path to being published is not meant to take the “bang my head against an idea or three until a good enough manuscript falls out to edit and query and get rejected and try again until the right one lands an agent” route.

I like to think I write really well to spec, and while I wouldn’t say I thrive on a deadline, I’m certainly very comfortable writing with a due date in mind (and actually meeting it). While my personal projects languish in first draft — or even worse, worldbuilding — hell because I have no outside pressure to stimulate me, my freelancing projects have never been late nor been so bad as to be unpublishable.

Is there a place for someone like me in the writing world? Well, duh, of course there is. That’s why I have this freelancing gig in the first place. But beyond that there are ghost writers and those who write for IP. It’s not really a matter if the kind of writer I apparently am has a space in publishing and literature, the real question is am I comfortable occupying it? Do I have the fortitude to accept that perhaps that writing my original ideas is not the path I was meant to take?

I don’t know. Obviously, this isn’t an either/or situation. There’s nothing stopping me from doing both, except, well, me. And the confines of time stubbornly refusing to accommodate how much work is physically and mentally possible during the day. But I digress.

It’s just something else to think about. In the short term, I’m going to keep freelancing and squeezing in the personal work where I can. At least that way I can be sure I’m always moving forward.

And that’s my motivation this week.

Kerry Share

Twitter | Instagram | Ko-Fi


Scribd subscribers, click here to find my romance novellas!

Monday Motivations; Two of Swords

Hello friends and welcome to another weird and wonderful week of writing!

On Friday, the holding pattern I’ve been in with my freelancing came to an end as the new pitch guidelines for the first quarter of 2022 came out. I had been anxiously waiting for that email for over a month, but as I reviewed the new guidelines my heart sank a little. What my publisher was asking for… well, it was all just a bit outside my comfort zone writing wise.

I confess, I went to bed discouraged.

But then I woke up and said to myself, “screw that.”

This is going to sound crass, but to be perfectly honest I didn’t apply for this freelancing work to write strictly what I wanted. No, I signed up so I could make money off my writing. That’s it. I needed cash and the opportunity was there. Was I a romance author before I landed this gig? Hell no. But that’s what the market (and my publisher) wanted and so, to earn some money when I was in a dire financial pinch, I became one.

Now, it turns out I love the work and find the experience in and of itself just as valuable as the money I’m making, but point is this job has been stretching my limits since day one. To hang my head and wonder if I’m able to step up to this new challenge goes against everything I’ve learned about myself this last year.

So, if keeping my freelancing gig means learning how to write steamier, cliche-ier romances? So be it. I’m gonna do it. If my imprint wants cozy mysteries, guess what conventions I’m going to be studying up on? Because, for me, this opportunity has shown me what I am capable of and it sure as hell doesn’t stop at writing fantasy whenever I feel up to it.

Sometimes writing is a business and dammit do I love my job.

Kerry Share

Twitter | Instagram | Ko-Fi


Scribd subscribers, click here to find my romance novellas!

Monday Motivations; The Chariot

It’s 2022, and guess what? I’M BACK BABY!

After I turned in my last manuscript of the year in early November (and struggling mightily to get creative momentum for NaNo or, well, literally anything else) I decided it was in my best interest to take a bit of a hiatus to recharge my batteries. The freelancing gig, as much as I love it, had really worn me out and with the holidays, other non-writing obligations to oversee, and the day job being slammed, I didn’t really have the bandwidth for any other sort of demands on my time.

Yet, while I enjoyed the break, I also really missed the hustle. I missed the creative surges, the rush to meet deadline, the dopamine hit of seeing my word count tracker creep toward the end goal. But most of all, I missed the feeling (the fact) that I was being productive with my time.

Over the last few weeks I’ve been chastising myself for not using this break from freelance work to more seriously tackle personal writing projects. My excuse, every single time, was “Well, none of my ideas inspire me right now.” And that’s true. Perhaps it was creative burn out, but at no point did I reflect upon the at least six novel ideas I have percolating and think that I needed to write any of them right now. So I didn’t. And now hiatus is over and I didn’t accomplish a single damn thing.

That got me thinking, and as I was mulling over my writing goals for the new year, and once again lamenting that none of my ideas are really jumping out at me at the moment, I realized that waiting for fickle inspiration to strike to write is some straight bullshit.

If there is one thing I have learned about writing, is that there is no such thing as the “perfect time” to write a story. There is no such thing as inspiration that lasts all 120,000 words of a novel. There will never be a moment that is ideal beyond description to start writing, and even if there is it only lasts just that long: a moment.

So, I want that energy to be what I take into 2022. No more waiting, no more passively sitting by and hoping my muse shows her face, no more blaming her absence for my lack of work ethic. Let this year be the year I chase my dreams down with a lasso and laser like precision.

It’s happening. And even I won’t stop me this time.

Kerry Share

Twitter | Instagram | Ko-Fi


Scribd subscribers, click here to find my romance novellas!

Monday Motivations; Pedal to the Metal

Friends, it’s been a weird seven days. After a successful Monday of writing, I proceeded to go on a five day anti-creative skid during which even thinking about writing made me want to crawl under the covers and hide.

Fortunately, the brain fog eventually lifted and yesterday I managed to put together one of my most productive days as a working writer/mom/person who needs to relax some of the time.

Today I woke up and there was still more to do. Over the weekend I got back not one but TWO projects for editing, to say nothing of the edits my current manuscript needs, I’m still two days behind in my word count, and November is just one short week away.

In short, I got shit to do.

And, truth be told, I thought I would be overwhelmed. But, honestly, it felt kind of… inspiring to be this busy. Like, this is what it means to be a working writer. And maybe it’s just because I woke up with the right brain chemistry today, but instead of feeling disillusioned, I felt… grateful. Grateful to have this opportunity and grateful that I’m in a position to utilize it when so many others are not.

So, I’m going to tackle those edits and I’m gonna write some more words, and you know what? I might even pitch an article (gulp). Because I’m a writer and that’s what I do.

Until next time, friends.

Kerry Share Twitter | Instagram | Ko-Fi


Scribd subscribers, click here to find my romance novellas!

Monday Motivations; I’m Not Special

Good morning friends. I am back after a long week during which the perfect storm of stressful life events and a deadline conspired to keep me from meaningfully blogging, or even thinking about anything extraneous.

While last week may be an outlier in terms of demand on my time and attention, it got me thinking yet again about the difficulty of balancing a writing career with, well, everything else.

Because it seems impossible and yet, empirically, it is not. Plenty of other writers have found a way to have a day job, fulfill familial obligations, and write. Even my hope to maintain my freelance writing whilst working on personal passion projects is not unique to me.

So, if all those other writers can do it, why not me? What do they have that I don’t?

Under normal circumstances I would consider thoughts like these counterproductive. Comparing another author’s success to my own (or lack thereof as it were) is a recipe that the anxiety brain simply salivates over.

That being said, I need to know that it’s possible. I need to look to those who came before and realize that they too had to struggle with balancing their checkbook of time, and that if they did it so can I.

My struggles aren’t special, and they sure as hell aren’t an excuse to give up.

That’s my motivation this week.

Until next time friends!

Kerry Share

Monday Motivations; The Grind

Hello friends and welcome to another fun an exciting week of writing.

At least, I wish it was exciting. Actually, today I’m finding myself a little caught up in the doldrums of the daily grind. When sitting myself down to write this post I found that I didn’t have much in the way of motivation, other than the usual “you’re under contract and you definitely don’t want to put it off like last time” feelings.

It’s funny, because for the last several years my main goal has been to become a working writer. And though I knew writing as a job would at times be just as tedious and unfun as a regular day job might be, knowing something abstractly and experiencing it practically are two different beasts altogether.

All that to say, I have nothing new to add this week. No special pearls of insights that came to me as I set about my day, no wisdom to expound upon as I look forward to another week of just grinding out those words. The only thing I have is the reminder to myself, cold comfort though it may feel at the moment, that I wanted this. I still do, of course, no matter how unexciting it feels this morning. This is what it means to be a working writer, in some respects. The knowledge that it’s just like any other job.

Until next time my friends.

Kerry Share

Twitter | Instagram | Ko-fi

Monday Motivations; Never Not Working

Hello friends! I’ve been absent these last two weeks thanks first to being absolutely slammed at my day job, and second to a planned and much needed vacation. The fall and winter seasons always tend to be the busiest for me both at work and in writing, so a break from both was just the respite I needed to get my mind right for the blitz.

But I’m back now and thinking about that shampoo commercial with Troy Polamalu and Patrick Mahomes. You know the one. More specifically, I’m ruminating on its signature phrase: never not working.

I had a lot of downtime this last month, the most I’ve had since (still miraculously, to me) landing my freelancing gig in April. And while I definitely needed a bit of a breather, I still found myself feeling… restless. Itchy. Like I needed to be doing something. Writing, preferably. Drafting, even more specifically.

As someone who has struggled a lot as an adult with anxiety and depression, who slips all too easily in time wasting but oh so comfortable activities and bad habits, the desire to use my limited free time to work came as something of a surprise to me, but a welcome one at that. It has long been a goal of mine, impossible it though had seemed at times, to turn that itchy part in my brain that makes me write into a career, yet my worst nature to deprioritize that which is not strictly necessary in my day to day life has forestalled meaningful progress toward that goal for as far back as I can remember.

Yet, the distinctly unsettled experience I have been — ahem — enjoying this last month tells me that maybe I am ready to take that step. To think of writing not as a hobby or a passion project, but as a job that deserves to be taken every bit as seriously as my 9 to 5. And if that is the case I need to prepare myself for the hustle. Because if I’ve learned anything about professional writers, freelancers, self-published, and agented a like, it’s that they are Never Not Working.

So today, that’s my motivation.

Speaking of which, time to get back to it. Until next time!

Kerry Share

Monday Motivations; No Rest For the Working Writer

I’ll admit it folks: I was pretty darn tempted to forgo blogging today (or this week, or even this month). After all, with no active freelance project to inform my writing needs for the next four or five weeks, what could I possibly have to talk about?

Well, as it happens, I’m still a working writer, even if I’m not “working” at the moment.

In fact, when I sat down with my journal this morning to outline how I would like to spend this non-working month, a surprising amount of writing related tasks came up.

For starters, my next pitch due date is September 6th. I’ve already determined that I’d like to do two pitches this quarter (three being too many and one not enough), which gives me two weeks (each) to put together and refine an idea into something sellable. Should be plenty of time, but I also wouldn’t be that surprised if I completely lost track of things and ended up with just a few days to throw things together.

Which is sort of the point I’m dwelling on here. It would be really easy for me to take a month long vacation from writing here. Spend my after day job hours loafing around playing video games or watching tv or all those lovely time wasting activities I do so dearly miss. But what good would that do me? Truly? None. I would only be putting myself in the unenviable position of having to get back into the habit of writing every day. Which, for me, a person who struggles mightily with habit formation and maintenance, would be… uh, shitty to say the least.

So I’ve got to keep after it. But I can’t expect two pitches to keep me occupied an entire month can I?

Which leads me the second big writing related task I want to tackle this month: figuring out what the hell personal project I want to try and tackle. I have so many ideas at so many different stages of development, and, truthfully, all of them and none of them feel like… the correct choice.

I’m sure there’s some analysis paralysis at play here. I would medal in the Overthinking Olympics. And I know that continuing to try and force it would only make it worse. But, with how much time and oxygen the freelancing gig has eaten up, I’m worried that if I don’t take this brief moment of downtime now to advance my personal writing, then those ideas will forever and always be on the back burner. And as much as I have loved this freelancing thing, my goals for my writing career extend far beyond it.

So that’s my motivation this week month. Sort through my feelings on each of these ideas I’ve got and figure out which one lies at the cross section of inspiration and aspiration. Then develop it. Nurture it. Prepare it. Outline it. And heckinf write it.

Oh, yeah. And I’d also like to finish this book I’ve been tryna read all summer.

Until next time friends.

Kerry Share

Twitter | Instagram | Ko-fi